Therapy is not for the faint of heart. It requires fearlessness or the willingness to push through that obstacle. Vulnerability and honesty are the names of the game. If you hold back your truth, you can be sure you won’t get the help you need.
Couples therapy can be even more daunting than individual therapy because you will be opening your heart in front of another person. You might be afraid of being judged or misunderstood, and that’s understandable; however, if you don’t put yourself out there, you’ll never know all the possible beauty.
When you show up with fearlessness, you are unattached to the results. You recognize that there is no “bad” result. No matter what, you will grow as a person. Most couples go to therapy wanting the happily ever after, and the reality is that it is not always in the cards. Don’t let the fear of divorce or separation keep you from showing up in all your glory, warts, and all.
Couples therapy is like a two-for-one deal. You are not only working on your relationship, but you are each working on yourselves individually. It can be terrifying to take a long, hard look at yourself. You might not like what you see, but the good news is once you have that awareness, you can make necessary changes. Awareness is always the first step towards transformation.
Therapy requires an openness to feedback. It requires the willingness to receive feedback from a therapist and hearing your partner’s thoughts, feelings, and perceptions. Fearlessness means taking that feedback gracefully, processing it, and trying to apply it where informed. It means not getting defensive even when you want to.
Fearlessness means being willing to do whatever it takes, even if it’s scary. Do the homework, try the practices, shift your communication, share your feelings.
Fearlessness means being all in and not one foot out the door.
You will not get the results you desire if you don’t show up with a fearless mindset ready to do the work. Don’t get in the way of living your best life.
